I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
Do you think I could convince a doctor that my uterus is poisoning me? It wouldn't technically be a lie. It does more harm than good.
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
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