But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
How’s your Christmas Eve so far?
I just chased my melatonin with red wine. It’s 12:00pm.
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
Randomize
