guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
I used an emoji to tell him I was pregnant. I should feel bad about that, right?
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Randomize
