dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
im having a threesome with these popsicles
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
WHY didn't you stop me from ordering $900 worth of socks last night when I was very obviously judgement impaired at the time?!?!
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
Randomize
