wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
You know what would have been funny if we got arrested last night? The inventory search of the lock box:\n\nContents:\n1 work ID\n1 33 round Glock magazine\n1 set of keys\n1 vibrator\n2 bags fruit snacks\n1 parking hang tag
Randomize
