That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
My girlfriend went down on me and as she did she hummed the theme from star wars and pretended my dick was a lightsaber...I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
I was just told that I'm the Sherlock Holmes of drunken sex. I'll take it.
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