Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
she kept asking for a lobster dinner while she was crying. it was actually the most reasonable drunk chick request i've ever heard.
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
I went in the hotel's jacuzzi fully clothed, threw up in the bathroom half an hour later and woke up naked next to Dr. Seuss' "Oh the Places You'll Go"
Randomize
