I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
Bought pregnancy tests in bulk off amazon. Kinda feel insulted that it asked if I wanted to subscribe for regular shipments.
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
So vagazzling was a success
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
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