How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
Yeah. I don't know. I'm just gonna show up at her place on valentines day with a jock strap, box of chocolates, and rose clenched between my ass cheeks with "be mine" written across my glorious man titties.
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
Randomize
