You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
I showed him my bush... on skype.
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
Seriously... There's something wrong here. I'm drinking vodka to mask the smell of chocolate on my breath before I get home and he finds out. I fucking hate couple dieting...
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
