I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
so, my congressman just called me to say he has office hours this week if i'm still interested in talking to him. i pray to god this is not related to Friday.
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
Hey Im running from the cops. hiding in a bush. when you're approaching the intersection honk the horn twice and I will come out.
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
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