i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
The typical response to someone smacking their vodka soaked hand on your face is not to put your face in their crotch
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
