Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
How am I?!! The turkey is dry as shit, I'm watching football in low def and there's no beer b/c everyone is in aa. Fuck giving thanks.
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
Randomize
