how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
Randomize
