I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
You need to go! It’s a midwestern wedding - the single girls out there think life ends at 25 if they don’t have a picket fence and family. That’s when your penis introduces himself
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
Randomize
