awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
Woke up chewing my pillow from a dream where I was scarfing Cajun pasta from TGI Friday's. That's a new level of fat, even for us
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
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