I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
Randomize
