sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
38 yer olds are good kisserssss
Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
Was expecting a sext from Kristi and then my mom randomly sent me a pic of her ugly Xmas sweater. Worst. Buzzkill. Ever.
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
If you had asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be right now at 26 years old, I can bet you one million dollars that "tweezing out my nose hairs before I go in to get laser hair removal on my upper lip" would NOT have been the answer
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
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