They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
Every time you blow me I should make a paper crane and we'll make them into a chain and hang them from the ceiling. And then whenever we have people over and they ask what the cranes are for I'll say "reminders" and wink at you.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
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