i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
You wore a man's plastic top hat last night.
No I didn't. Whiskey did.
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
Randomize
