Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
i was having this nice romantic moment with my girlfriend. then jimmy came in and peed on the fridge
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
Randomize
