How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
The fact that I found him in his Ninja Turtles t-shirt next to six empty and obviously consumed packs of EasyMac watching reruns of Becker certainly made telling him that I wanted a divorce so much easier than I had planned.
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
Chef at hibachi place learned it was my bday and sprayed 20 second count worth of saki in my mouth. Not sure it was the right image to share with my kids, but thought you'd be proud.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
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