just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
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