I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
the new apple iphone has a feature that can find itself if you lose it, apple is getting closer to making a phone completely drunkproof...
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
As soon as the clock wound down to zero, she declared "HALF-TIME HEAD" and pulled down my pants. After the swallow, she said "BEER CHASER," got me a new one, and asked if she could make me a sandwich. Pretty sure she's lobbying hard for a ring.
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
Randomize
