At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
Bro, I live in a constant state of existential dread and moderate ennui. The prospect of cosmic horror doesn’t faze me that much.
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
Randomize
