susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
Only my sister would update her facebook status while going into labor.
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
Apparently the guard had to repeat "you're too drunk to get in" three times before I understood. I guess he was right.
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
Randomize
