No stitches, just platelets and will power
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
Randomize