so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
I could fuck to npr.
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
Randomize
