No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
Somewhere between the 30 minutes of cunnilingus, the improvised song about the Olympics, and the super thoughtful shower beer... I knew I married the right guy
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
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