My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
My mom is pretending to be Paula Deen while making breakfast...I'm pretty sure she's sober.
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
Blow job season was short but glorious.
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
Randomize
