Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
Now that we have successfully procreated, I need to know we are on the same page. Please tell me you are aware that there are whole seasons of our lives that our child can NEVER be made privy to.
We should probably write this down. That's a shit load of shit.
You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
WTF. I was 99% sure I went straight home last night. I just woke up hugging a chair, and my tux pocket has a flask filled with what I think is red bull and gatorade. This has to be your doing.
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
Randomize
