Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
Randomize
