Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
You can't break up with me. I brought you to see Beyoncé.
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
Randomize
