she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
Randomize
