my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
you need to not memorize your credit card number for drunk pizza
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
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