You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
I'm drunk at The Bachelor casting call in Cleveland
I cherish every text you send me
last night some bitch put bruce along with his entire fishbowl in her purse and tried to leave. how drunk do you have to be to steal someone's pet??
In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
I got inside last night via doggy door
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
Jack said he hasn't jerked off in like two weeks and he's like a smoldering volcano who wants to bury you like Pompeii with his man gravy
Randomize
