i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
Randomize
