If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
I walked into the bathroom and there's this 6'5" cop washing his hands. He looks at me and goes, "Heard you singing outside. Sound real pretty."
No more tequila EVER.
Status: mom bitching about grandma not shutting the fuck up, while not shutting the fuck up. Dear Jesus give me strength or more bourbon.
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
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