I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
Randomize
