please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Randomize
