I just saw a guy give a mop to his fat wife and say "Look, an exercise stick!"
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
This baby is an asshole
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
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