I dreamt Michael Jackson dropped his pants in front of me and I had to ignore it.
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
Let the clothes fall where they may.
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Randomize
