She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
I won't be able to make it. Too hung over. Can't hold down fluids. I'm in the bathtub trying to hydrate my body through osmosis. And yes, Tequila Tuesday is totally still on for tonight.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
Randomize
