I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
I mean technically the bite was both in my nose and on the outside of it. I thought I was going to need stitches or something.
Why was his mouth around your nose anyways?
It was just one of those nights, man.
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
The waitress at the Denny's in usa remembered me from 2 years ago when we went at 4 in the morning plastered, wearing overalls and huge inflatable corona hats on our heads
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