he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
I almost took home a boy from the bar last night, till i realized he was not speaking drunk, he was from another country and didnt know english. that could have been an awkward morning.
dollar beers will do that to you.
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
So my flight takes off at 8am. Does this mean I need to break my airport bar pre-flight ritual?
Aren't you the one who taught me that airports are the judgement-free drinking zone?
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
Clearly you need to take sleeping pills and put your phone in the toilet
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
Randomize
