Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.
I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
Randomize
