Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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