That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
i wish there were pregnant emoticons
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
I'm way too hungover for life right now
Well my normal tinder strategy of "Will I have sex with her when I'm sober" has been paying off
Randomize
