You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
Didn't I tell you I have developed a shameless theory about farting anywhere and everywhere? I'm too pretty so no one suspects me.
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
Malibu has added tequila to its rum. It's like when two beautiful gaybies come together an spawn a unicorn that only cries jellybean tears.
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
My breasts were aching with rage.
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
I thought accidentally shaving off my fingertip while trying to shave my butthole was going to be the most unexpected part of my day, but no
I don't know what else is in your wedding gift, but I just pulled out a pair of handcuffs in front of her grandmother.
Also a whip and a blindfold. Don't be a bitch, enjoy it!
Randomize
