there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
It's ok, I may have just peed outside your car and used your whataburger napkins. Hope you weren't saving them for a special occasion.
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
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